Monday, February 4, 2013

It's all topsy turvy in my artist brain right now


Do you ever get that way too? The organized side of my brain is all about sewing things professionally, then needle felting them with perfection, and paying attention to getting things "just so". Then, when I get myself in front of the painting easel with a brush in hand and paint on the palette, things just go all haywire... 

For me, painting is about the Not Knowing, it's "venturing out" and all 'going-with-the-flow'. It works me over, and even though I struggle with it, I crave the process like a dog craves a bone....


An under painting by Val Hebert, from Flora Bowley's Bloom True class


My art journey began when I was young. My first teacher was my mom. My mom's schedule in my earliest memory was like this:
Go into the woods with friends and gather pods. Return home and make pod art ensemblages. Go to fabric store and get enough supplies to make curtains or a dress. Go home and sew. Try painting classes. Give up and declare "I have no painting talent!" Instead, paint the room a different color. Sew up new curtains, and give the room a whole new look. Move the furniture around. Then take up wallpapering. Go into business wallpapering friends homes. Drink lots of beer. (Wallpapering works up a thirst!) Lol! Remember I said this is an early memory, like before I was 5!
So, this week, here I am sewing. Then cleaning everything up to paint. Then cleaning everything up to sew... I don't sense a good trend here. I find myself falling back to sewing and needle felting because its predictable, safe, and easy for me to do. When I paint, I am groveling at the painting easel, and asking for divine intervention... Just let my inspiration flow... please... flow.... Ugh! These colors are killing me. Things seem muddy, bland, too predictable. I can certainly see its time for me to paint, and if I'm smart, I will just pack the sewing away for now. 

Perhaps divine intervention will find a way to take over my bleak hesitation. Yes, this is what I've missed. This is what I need. This is why I paint...

I'm taking Flora Bowley's Bloom True online class, and even though it may sound like I'm not enjoying it, I'm actually loving it, along with all the frustrations and unease the paint puts in my way... 

Grrrr... Paint, I will warn you: I will win!!!

x, Val

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